Fried Ham

Fried ham, fried ham 
Cheese and bologna 
And after the macaroni 
We’ll have onions, pickles, and pretzels 
And then we’ll have some more fried ham, 
Fried ham, fried ham! 

Same song, second verse, English accent little bit worse ... 
Same song, third verse, Southern accent little bit worse ... 
Same song, fourth verse, Opera style little bit worse ... 
Same song, fifth verse, Robot style little bit worse ... 
Same song, sixth verse, Tongue stuck to teeth little bit worse ... 
and on and on and on ... (underwater, baby, no teeth, etc.)

Weenie Man

I know a weenie man
He owns a weenie stand
He sells most anything
From hotdogs on down

Some day I'll join his life
I'll be his weenie-wife
HOT DOG! I love that weenie maaaan

Weenie, weenie, weenie
On a bun, bun, bun
Add some mustard too!
Weenie, weenie, weenie
On a bun, bun, bun
Add some mustard too!

A pickle, a dash of catsup, 
A slice of onion, or maybe twooooo
We'll make a - very fine luncheon
For us to munch on - Let's do!

Thousand Legged Worm

Said the thousand legged worm as he gave a little squirm:
Has anybody seen a leg of mine? (leg of mine!)
For if it can't be found, 
I'll have to walk around,
on the other nine-hundred ninety-nine! (ninety nine!)

Hop around (hop around!)
Hop around (hop around!)
on the other nine-hundred ninety nine.

For if it can't be found, 
I'll have to walk around,
on the other nine-hundred ninety-nine! (ninety nine!)

Junior Birdman

Up in the air- Junior Birdman
Up in the air- upside down
Up in the air- Junior Birdman
Keep your noses off the ground

When you hear the whistle blow - toot toot
And you see the clank of tin - clank clank
You will know that Junior Birdman
Has turned his boxtops in

B-I-R-D-M-A-N
Birdman
Birdman
Whoosh!

An Austrian Went Yodeling

An Austrian went yodeling on a mountain so high
When along came a cuckoo bird interrupting his cry:

Ohh-lee-oh!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo

Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo

Odlee-oh cuckee-ah, oh.

An Austrian went yodeling on a mountain so high
When along came a grizzly bear interrupting his cry: 

Ohh-lee-oh!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr

Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah, oh.

An Austrian went yodeling on a mountain so high
When along came a St. Bernard interrupting his cry

Ohh-lee-oh!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff!

Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah, oh.

An Austrian went yodeling on a mountain so high
When along came a skier interrupting his cry

Ohh-lee-oh!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff! swish
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff! swish

Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff! swish
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah, oh.

An Austrian went yodeling on a mountain so high
When along came a preacher interrupting his cry

Ohh-lee-oh!
Odlee-oh cuckee-ah
Odlee-oh cuckoo cuckoo - grrrrrrr- ruff! swish- amen.

Make New Friends

Make new friends but keep the old,

One is silver and the other's gold.

A circle is round, it has no end

Thats how long I want to be your friend.

Doughnut Shop

Welllllll I walked around  the corner 
And I walked down the block
And I walked right into the doughnut shop
And I picked up a doughnut 
Right out of the grease
And I handed the lady a five-cent piece.

Wellllllll she looked at the nickel 
And she looked at me
And she said, "This money is no good you see...
There’s a hole in the middle
And it goes right through"
And I said, "there’s a hole in the doughnut too!"

Thanks for the doughnut, two bites.